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Monday, May 24, 2010

Storm Brewing in the World of Que

There is something happening in the Que household that I'm not too sure about.  I have slept on this for several nights and still haven't found the peace within my soul to say this is a good decision or not.  I have weighed the Pro and Cons and have made up my mind regardless of the outcome.  My 4-year old daughter is taking Martial Arts.

To most of you this doesn't sound like a big deal.  But to my long time (a few months worth) readers this is HUGE!  If you read my Fatherly Advice to My Middle Child you will know that she is in an interesting position.  She's a B.R.U.T.E. but she hasn't gained any weight (probably) since her 1st birthday.  It's hard to be a B.R.U.T.E. when you throw your weight around and get swept up by the wind.  She's one good sneeze away from being one of those "helicopter" seeds that fall out of trees and spin their way to the ground.  Therein lies the problem.

With the little one catching up to her in weight, I fear for her safety.  Granted, it's a SLOW catching up but a catching up, nonetheless.  And when the little one gets to the right size I predict the B.R.U.T.E. is going see a hurtin'.  And to make it worse, the B.R.U.T.E. didn't even read my letter to her.  So she's sleeping on the floor in the little's one room.  (This is actually a sore subject of mine because we paid good money for her to have nice mattresses to sleep on last year and she STILL likes to sleep on the floor).  So the two doors and 20ft of carpet separating the two have now been reduced to the baby jail bars.  With the little one's sentence ending soon this could get interesting.

Now maybe she's taking the "keep your friends close and your enemies closer" approach.  If that's the case, she's a genius.  Or she's taking this time to get some extra mocking in before the bars come of.  If THAT'S the case... she's an idiot.  Either way, it's probably time to teach her to protect herself since she insists on playing so close to the hornets nest.

She's now taking Taekwondo (first class was tonight).  This should give her the means of protecting herself against the little one's fists of fury.  The thing that makes it a problem is what happens if she decides to be true to her namesake (B.R.U.T.E.) and starts to Taekwondo-size her little sister (or anyone else's kids for that matter)?  I'm pretty sure I could stop her.  I mean, I have the weight on her.  I have the lightning speed of a cheetah.  I'm ready to pounce at a moment's notice. But what happens when I'm not there.  The little one can't make complete sentences yet (minus "thank you").  So the B.R.U.T.E. might just adopt the policy "What happens in the toddler room, stays in the toddler room."  And, that's just what I'm afraid of.

SO what's a father to do?  Do I take the side of the B.R.U.T.E. and "potentially" hand her the Weapon of Lass Destruction.  OR... Do I keep her from taking Martial Arts classes and allow the little one to pass her in size and strength and become the BIGGER, little sister (capable of taking down older siblings with one punch).

That was the protector in me talking.

What I really want to do is prepare them both so I have a reason to buy a referee's uniform.  Then I can set up a webcam and take bets on the ensuing frenzy that is Toddler Fighter Challenge (check your cable company for Pay Per View rates and times).


I'm just kidding....
Or am I?

Let's get ready to RUMBLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEE!!!!