It Must Be Stopped At All Costs

I have less time than I thought.  I made it through 12 years with the first one.  I kinda made it through 5 years with the second one.  But it has already started with my youngest.  My 2YO has a boyfri........
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Sorry for the silence.  I passed out for a minute.  But I'm back.  Now where was I? Oh, yeah! This passing out just recently started.  I have never passed out before in my life until I found out about my 2YO's boyfri.........
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I'm back.  Now where was I? Oh, yeah!  This is serious!  I focused all of my attention to my oldest and I now realized it was a COMPLETELY misplaced effort.  The little 2YO flew in under the radar.  (She's really small so odds are she really just walked in under the radar.)  And what makes it worse is that she even knows the little boy's name.  I'm refuse to write his name because I've just now started acknowledging his existence.

Then, to add insult to injury... My wife thinks this is funny!  I don't see the humor in this AT ALL.  She thinks it's all cute and stuff.  It's about as cute as this dog...

Yeah, really.  That cute.

I look at it like this.  It's like spending your time and effort taking care of your beautiful flower garden.  You spend hours and hours making sure it has the right amount of water.  You make sure the soil has the right PHes and such.  (Shows how much I know about a flower garden.)  You spare no expense in getting the right mulch and stones to accent the wonderfully planned EDENesque scene.  Then, while you were pruning the flowers to perfection... a weed pops up right smack in the middle of the garden!

There it is... a freakin' dandelion! Yeah, they're cute to look at but they create two problems in this scenario.  The first one is that we all know what happens to dandelions.  They look pretty for a while then they turn into little ugly puffballs of evilness.  Then the wind blows and they spread their praises to the dark one throughout the land.  (They also spend more of their life as a stupid puffball than a pretty flower.  So you can take that analogy as far as you want to.)

The other reason they create a problem is that in the grand scheme things.... I don't care how cute the weed may be, it's still a weed and shouldn't be in my flower garden!  It makes me change my objective.  I go from a positive agenda of nurturing and loving to negative one of search and destroy.  And I'm a nice guy.  I don't like living in the negative.  Dandelions do that to me!
 
I also don't care that my flower garden... I mean, daughter is only 2YO.  It starts somewhere.  And it's like a disease.  It will continue to spread unless you do something about it.  No matter what people think (Joan and Mindy) this IS preventable and, more importantly, stoppable.  My little cutie gets anything she wants.  But this is where I draw the line.  I don't care if she does give me the Princess Pouty Face.

My Pouty Princess in training. 

I am immune to Princess Poutiness under certain circumstances.  I have to keep my emotions repressed. I will not let it sway my decision on what I KNOW is right!  And if I try hard enough, I might even be able to repress the whole notion that my 2YO has a boyfr........
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Now where was I? Oh, yeah!