Where are the Penguin Pjs? - Part 2

Sisterhood of the Traveling PJs.

Well, fellas (all 3 of my male readers (and you know who you are)) you will appreciate this story. It didn't take long for all to be right with the world.  There is this weird feeling you get when you NOTICE things balancing out.  Most of the time it happens and you miss it.  But when you catch it... pure poetry.

Note: If you have not read PART 1 of the Penguin PJs then go ahead.  We will stop so you can catch up.  No, go ahead.  I'm serious!  We are going to wait right here until you finish.

Now that you are done...

This day started like any other.  My job is to make sure that when I leave for work, I have gotten 3 girls ready for their day at school.  There's the feeding.  There's the clothing.  There's diaper changing.  There's the doing the hair (which is always (NEVER) fun).  You get the routine.

Occasionally, my daddy to-do list looks a little different.  And men being creatures of habit hate when there is something different on the list.  Well, today I have to add that the 4-year old's class is having a PJ party.  So my instructions are to take the cookies that my wife made the night before (with love) and to let the 4-year old decide which PJs she is going to wear.  She had the Cheerleader PJs (that I didn't even know she had (even though she has probably worn them several times in my overly observant presence)) and the infamous Penguin PJs.  Now I'm going to give you one guess as to which one she wants.

Because my beautiful wife is always thinking she KNEW that the 4-year old would want the Penguin PJs.  So she had them washed and all I had to do was take them out of the washer and put them into the dryer.  Even I couldn't screw that up (that's not true (but I didn't screw it up!  And that's all that counts!)).


I got the kid fed (early).  I got the kids dressed (early).  I even finished the 4-year old's hair (early).  She didn't fight much because she was wearing her favorite PJs today to school.  Now, it's time for school!  Oh... I almost forgot the snacks.  My wife wouldn't be happy if I forgot those.  So I grabbed the cookies.  NOW, it's time for school.

We get to the 4-year old's school (did I mention... early?).  For some reason her legs were broken and she didn't tell me until now.  So daddy had to carry her into school.  Which is fine for me because the other option was trying to negotiate with her.  Those of you with kids know... what's the point?

On the way to ESP I look into the window and see ALL of the other kids whose parent have to be at work before school starts (I don't know who thought of that concept but I need to have a talk with them).  As I got closer... I noticed... that NONE of the other kids were wearing their PJs.  At first I thought that their parent got up too early and must have forgotten that today is PJ and party day.  Then I thought there was too many un-PJ'd kids for that to be the case.  There must be another reason.  Like... maybe this little fun day was only for my daughter's class.  Sounds reasonable.

We get into ESP and now we are being looked at.  I know my 4-year old couldn't feel it but I could.  There was this "one of these kids is doing his own thing" moment.  That's when I decided to open the backpack.  The note from the school was in there with all of the party information.  I read the bring a snack for x number of kids.  We did that.  I read the wear you favorite PJs part. We did that.  So what is wrong?  We did everything right.  We were ready for the party that was...

...wait for it....

...3 days away.

I hate to admit it, but my very first response was... :).  Fellas (all 3 of you), you know EXACTLY what I'm talking about.  It's that moment when someone screwed up, and it wasn't YOU!  For 1 millisecond I had that HA-HA feeling you get when the world finally spins the right way and all is well.  I'm going to take another moment right here....

.... That still feels good.

But that feeling didn't last long because reality took over.  We were standing there and my daughter was the only one in the whole school that was wearing her PJs.  So what now?  Luckily, we keep a spare set of clothes in her backpack.  They are just for emergencies and I'm pretty sure this counts as an emergency.

Happy ending.  Crisis averted.  Penguin PJs have yet another story to tell.  I can't wait until Thursday to see if cycle continues and the PJs take another victim.

Another Note: I told you my wife is smart.  She got ahead of this story (something Tiger Woods should have done).  She broke this news story on FaceBook.  So this was for all of those people that are not FB friends with her.  You guys got the REAL story.

Also as a friend of mine pointed out, I'm only kidding myself.  Somehow, someway, this is really my fault!  I must study this theory.  I will get back to you with my findings because I'm sure he's right.

Where are the Penguin PJs?

Yeah, I did it!  And I would do it again!  I made a statement and I'm sticking to it.  Some may say it was petty and misguided but to them I say, with the style as grace of a literary genius.... :-P <--- Oh, yeah... Don't mess with the QUE because you might get the tongue! (For some reason the BULL and the HORNS original quote sounds much more... menacing.  I'm not sure why).

This time of the year becomes interesting.  My wife is in retail so she works all the time and late hours.  So that means I get to spend a lot of fatherly time with the kids.  That ALSO means that for those few hours of the day... what I say goes!

If I want to feed the kids Cheerios for dinner (Multi-grain, though.  I'm a good father)... I can. And I'm not saying I have ever done that.  I'm just saying that if I wanted to, there is no one there to stunt my awesome parenting skills.  If I wanted to feed the baby beans when I know it's my wife's night to deal with her... I can.  Again, that's not to say that I would (or have EVER done that).  That's just to prove the point that for these few hours each night during this time of the year are MINE.  (I really should tell you the story about me taking the 4-year old and the 1-year old to the "salon" to get the 4-year old's hair cut.)

With that unwritten rule (which apparently should be written), I have the freedom to dress the kids anyway I choose.  A few nights ago I had one of those "I'm in charge" nights.  So I went through the mental checklist.  I played with the kids... check.  I fed the kids...check (I will neither confirm nor deny the involvement of any said Cheerios).  I gave them baths...check (separate baths, of course.  Those who read this post know why). I put the little one to bed...check.  Now it's time to get the 4-year old ready.

This is where the fun comes in.  She hates brushing her teeth.  So there is always this song and dance when it comes to the teeth brushing thing.  It normally starts with the word NO (GRRR) and it usually ends with me giving my VERY authoritative, VERY stern MANLY voice commanding her to brush or else.  I even stand up sometimes for the affect (Since I'm 6'3" and she's much, much smaller.  That technique has the opposite affect on my wife, though).  She's pretty smart, however.  So I have to watch what and how I tell her things.  If I just tell her to brush her teeth but don't tell her how long, she's usually done in 2.7 seconds (personal best).

Now it is time to change into her night-night clothes.  She always wants to wear her Penguin PJs.  This is an easy one.  But of course... not this night.  When I go to look for them, they are no where to be found.  GREAT!  That usually means they are currently in one of 2 places: the washer or the dryer.  Either way, that's not going to help me now.  DING, DING!  That signaled the beginning of Round 2.  Time for the yelling, kicking and screaming (and that's just me)!  I get to spend the next 10 minutes trying to convince her that her Minnie Mouse PJs are WAY COOLER (they aren't).  What about the Butterfly PJs? NO! What about the Flower PJs? NO!  What about the Panda PJs (which are too big because they are her older sister's hand-me-downs but she likes them anyway)? NO!  What about these???

I reach into a pile of newly dried clean clothes and grab some PJs.  Hmmm... These are cool.  What do you think about these?  And there is was... the 4-year olds approval.  YES!  That's all I needed.  So I put the PJ bottoms on.  Wow, these are kinda tight and a little short.  This is probably the last time she gets to wear these.  I'm not sure if I said that out loud or not, but I was thinking it.  Now for the PJ top.  I had a little problem getting it over her fro (even though I just had it cut a few days earlier).  But I finally shoved her head through the neck hole.  These PJs were too much trouble.  This is definitely going to be the last time she wears these.  4-year old in her night-nights... check!

Parenting skills were in tact.  I started the night with 2 kids and ended with 2 kids (the other was at gymnastics) so that night was a good night. Until... my beautiful wife came home.  As the 4-year old sees mommy, she goes running to her yelling "Mommy, Mommy!" like normal.  But what wasn't normal was my wife's expression.  She was trying to keep a straight face.  She looked a little confused.  She knew it was daddy's night but something was still wrong.  She looked at me and with a very lovely tone asked...

"Why is the 4-year old wearing the baby's 12 - 18 month PJs?"

... What???

... That can't be right.

I really wish I had a good excuse for that one.  All I had was... "She wanted to wear them."  (Which was true) I said that with as much sincerity as I could muster all the while still trying to figure out how that happened.  But my wife knew.  She knew that I had a nice, classic daddy FAIL moment.  And I knew she knew when she fell out laughing!  Then I started kinda laughing (trying to not give it away that I didn't even notice it was the baby's clothes).  But when I viewed the scene with my new perspective I noticed that our daughter did have her Homer Simpson on.  As well as her father... DOH!

We let her sleep in the PJs.  It wasn't cutting off the circulation (that I could tell).  She liked them.  AND she wasn't going anywhere.  So I thought all was done.  But I guess my wife's FaceBook Status Update had a different set of plans.  The next morning, it decided to let the world know that the 4-year old looked like the Incredible HULK that morning and proceeded to tell why.  It turned a wonderfully fun, beautiful and PRIVATE father/daughter moment into something PUBLIC.

Needless to say, dirty or clean, the ONLY PJs my 4-year old will ever wear (on my shift) are the Penguin PJs.  Take that, FaceBook! (notice how I didn't point the finger at my wife.  I blamed FaceBook.  I'm more than a foot taller than she is but sometimes when I stand up next to her I still find myself looking up.)