My wife finishes the shopping and gets out to the car with the groceries and the kids. That's when she notices that the little angels decided to do a little shopping of their own. And since NETHER of them have any money (that we know about) it was a shock to my wife. I guess it would be considered a drive-by stealing because they were in that little car cart. I was just envisioning them as Thelma and Louise. (Only without the sex... and the drinking... and the guns... and the suicide... and definitely NO Brad Pitt (sorry, honey)! But other than that... Straight up Thelma and Louise!)
OK. I know that stealing is bad. It's still bad even when they use a not-so-bad-sounding term like shoplifting. Shoplifting sounds more like seeing something in a store that you want so badly that it becomes a religious event. (Like, "I saw these shoes I just had to have. It was a shoplifting experience! All of the cashiers rejoiced!") Now, you can call me sad if you want but I was more upset with what they stole than the actual act of stealing. They took Chicken Noodle Soup (OK), Pepperoni (Hmmm) and Kleenex (What the... Kleenex???). Now, we need to talk.
If that happened, I would have no choice but to teach them the err of their ways when we got home and were mounting the TV on the wall. And I think there are a few Blu-Ray movies that would do a better job than I ever could explaining the negative side of the path they have chosen. I don't have a Blu-Ray player yet but I AM taking 2 kids to Best Buy. And they BOTH need to learn a lesson.
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Sounds good to me.. And if they get caught.. Feign ignorance.
ReplyDeleteJust don't let them subscribe to your blog, it would make it seem pre-meditated.
@Eric - Thanks. We just have a week and a few days to get this done. I'm sure I can feign ignorance for at LEAST that long.
ReplyDeleteGood luck at Best Buy, but be warned. With those two you may just wind up with monitor cleaning wipes and compressed air in a can for Father's Day.
ReplyDelete@WeaselMomma - LOL! You might be right. If that's the case, I won't even bother teaching them that stealing is bad. They are not even doing it right to begin with! They would ALWAYS get let off with a warning.
ReplyDeleteDude, if they grab up any PS3's let me know.
ReplyDelete@Joeprah - I will scold them if they grab ANYTHING without paying. I won't have child of mine stealing. But if 2 PS3s happen to FALL into their pockets... I will let you know.
ReplyDeleteI just want to point out that Best Buy doesn't have those carts with the car thingy. And I may or may not have done that race car thing with my kids (and I'm a GIRL!). And once my son found a cookie from the bake shop that the previous occupant of the cart hadn't cared for...and ate it. Those carts are BAD NEWS.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm really liking this blog...
@The Mommy - Oh, I know there is no car cart at Best Buy. I wouldn't let them use that cart anyway at that store. It would be counterproductive. I want them to go through Best Buy as slow as possible. If I'm going to teach them a lesson, they need time to commit the crime.
ReplyDeleteHaha! The ole five finger discount... What ever you do don't take Thelma & Louise to the bank! I hear those dye packs leave terrible stains on the kiddies clothes and besides that I don't think you want them to have to wear those ankle bracelet monitors all summer long!
ReplyDelete-ME
(Que, you kill me!)
@ME - I don't know about the bracelet thing. I mean... If they had those on I would have a built-in excuse to not have to go to Chuck E Cheese's (or ANY birthday parties) the whole Summer. So let me think about that one for a while.
ReplyDeleteLOL!!! That's great!
ReplyDeleteMy 6-year-old son stole a balloon. Yeah. And the whole time I kept thinking about the SpongeBob episode where SpongeBob and Patrick steal balloons on National Free Balloon Day. Clearly, I need more adult interaction.
Oh yes, those car carts seem to bring out the drag racer in me, and I don't even have to have another car cart to race against. Any other cart will do. Wise decision to stay away from temptation. (At least temptation of your own.) Leading your children into temptation at Best Buy however, well.
ReplyDeleteIt IS Father's Day.
PS> I'm NOT passing your horrible message on to my daughter, although I truly wish you had said Your Welcome into the window as your wife drove away a few days ago.
I'll mail you some World Famous Mashed Potatoes - don't be afraid of the oddly shaped gooey envelope that arrives at your house later this week.
Jeremy's salivating at the thought of the new game, but he has to play it on a computer that doesn't get internet access. I don't know the reason; it's something technical.
@Dawn - I think adult interaction is highly overrated. And it's definitely not as fun. Well, most of the time.
ReplyDelete@Missy - I will be waiting for the (as my 4-year old says) tatoes! Gooey envelopes are the BEST. And as far as your hubby not playing over the internet... I think he is just afraid of my awesomeness! He must have been talking to some of my friends. :)
Happy Father's Day, Que! Relax and enjoy your day!
ReplyDelete-ME
@ME - Thanks! If I wasn't working today I would definitely relax and enjoy the day. But I'm working so I can't relax but I will enjoy the day when I go home to my wonderful family waiting for me. :)
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