I wonder... If I start acting sick now will my wife believe that I have Conjipti-functu-itis in a few weeks. She must not only believe that it is a rare (VERY RARE) condition but also that it is so rare (VERY RARE) that Google doesn't even know what it is yet. The only cure for it is bed rest, TV, lots of food and... well I'm going to stop there (adding the next item would insure she wouldn't believe me). Really, she just has to believe that I'm too sick to take the little one to the doctor. It's time for the 1-year shots in my house.
I was there for the middle child's shots. I think I saw all I needed to see. So if she's worried that I'm going to miss this wonderful rite of passage from tod to toddler then she can rest assured... I got it! I think I'm going to sit this one out.
I think she's got this thing ALL wrong. She's measuring the shot situation in quantity. And I'm measuring it in quality. A few years back our middle child had an infection in her finger. And I took one for the team. I had to hold my pre-toddler daughter in my arms (and not in a loving way. It was more of a please hold your daughter down so I don't get slapped kinda way...) while they gave her three shots down to the bone. They sent my wife and oldest out of the room for that one. So doing that one act should have bought me more than 3 years of reprieve from shots.
And if for some reason that doesn't fly then I think I'll see if I can categorize this as a father/daughter moment. That way if it's ever said that I don't spend enough time with her I can say, "Hey... We just went to the doctor last week (or month or year (I'm not sure what the statute of limitation is on that argument though)).
And when none of those pass my wife's BS-o-meter I will just have to man-up and do what I have to do.... reverse psychology! I will let her know that she is right. This IS a job for a man. And she did right by BEGGING me to take the little one in for her shots. The kids need MY support for strength and the love that only a father can give during these tough times. And to top it all off... I might even FORBID her from ever taking the kids to the doctor.
Just so everyone knows... If things go down so far that I have to resort to my previous paragraph then this might be my last blog entry. Because if I say any of the above to my wife... I will probably be one that needs to go to the doctor. And she will probably let me take that rite of passage all by myself.
Sooo true about the 2nd to last paragraph.... As a wife, I can say that! :)
ReplyDeleteYou just need a factory job. I don't think Caleb has been there for ANY shots! And I had to hold down my ALMOST one year old while the doctor drew two tubes of blood. Not fun.
ReplyDeleteCome on Heather... It wasn't THAT bad.
ReplyDeleteWas it? :)
Factory Job... I didn't think of that excuse!
I've held all 3 of mine for their shots, as their Daddy has always conveniently been at work. I need to take notes from your wife.
ReplyDeleteI have been there for a few shots. That first one was particularly bad. Our middle child was only a few months old when she got an infection in her finger. When we went to the Dr. they had to give her 3 shots. With all 3 they had to poke the needle around inside her finger until they hit bone before they released the medicine. It was TERRIBLE! We were in Colorado (on vacation) so I couldn't use ANY excuses for that one.
ReplyDelete"The only cure for it is bed rest, TV, lots of food and... well I'm going to stop there (adding the next item would insure she wouldn't believe me)."
ReplyDeleteI laughed so hard, I choked, and my three year old wants to know "What happened?" which is her way of asking "What are you laughing about?"
I'll let you tell her...you're so good at all those tough jobs.