The Reeducation of America... and me

I was asked (in a non-nosy manner) why I took on a 2nd Full-Time job.  So I figure if THAT person was wondering the same thing, then someone else probably is too.  I have decided appease the masses and give a little insight into the World of Que.  Unfortunately, this section will be classified as the non-funny portion of Que World.  It's a pretty small section but has a HUGE impact.

Money, Money, Money

Where to start... Well, we have debt.  That's the simple truth.  We, like most American households, have enough debt that it makes us uncomfortable.  We have tried a lot of avenues to rid ourselves of the evilness of debt.  Some worked but none worked well.  So we decided to try OUR last resort.  And that was to increase our income by finding another job.

It's the dietary equivalent of trying to lose weight but not knowing the right way.  Then trying every diet plan under the sun.  THEN after having marginal success with some plans and complete failure with others, deciding to go to the last resort... a lot of exercise!  This is us putting aside a lot of other "luxuries" in life and getting on the dreaded financial treadmill and just running until we pass out... literally.

I personally think the debt mentality starts a lot earlier than we care to accept.  I started teaching our oldest daughter about debt and finances at the age of 7.  Some may feel that is early.  But I don't think it's early enough.  It wasn't like I was having her file my taxes.  I was just teaching her basic principles of money.  But not just that.  I was teaching her some of the basic principles of finance.  I think this is where the disconnect in my life started.

My parents didn't teach me those lessons.  I don't BLAME them one single bit, though.  They grew up poor.  Their parents grew up poor.  And their parents before them grew up poor. (You get the picture.)  So how do you teach your child about how to bake a chocolate cake if no one ever taught you how an over works?  Eventually, if you are to break the cycle, someone has to teach someone how to bake a cake!

Another place that I think fails is school.  And I'm not talking about all schools.  As a matter of fact, I think teachers should be one of the highest paid professions in the world.  But here is what I'm talking about with school.  School is supposed to help prepare us for life AFTER school.  One of the biggest (if not THE biggest) dilemmas we face after school is how to handle money.  So why isn't there a LOT more emphasis on that?  Yeah, we learn what money is and how to use (spend) it.  But most of us never truly learn how it works.  And that is the HUGE fail in my book.

If we really think schools are supposed to help prepare us for life, then this is something that should be taught almost every day and at almost every grade level.  Finances should be a reflex by the time you graduate.  We are a capitalistic society.  And that is true whether you agree with it's principles are not.  I just think that economics classes in school should have more "real world" value and not just a class that people glide through.  As important as money is (again whether you like it or not) economics should be ranked up there with reading, 'riting and 'rithmatic.  I think we as a society should be given better tools to deal with such a huge problem that affects everyone.

I know some of that sounded like a rant but it really wasn't meant to be that way.  I honestly believe that ultimately, we are responsible for WHO we are as well as WHERE we are in life.  So this is not a pity party "blame the system" post.  This is more of a "yes, most of us were failed but here's what WE plan to do about it going forward" post.  I do believe that it's sad when you live in a time when you feel having 2 full-time jobs a blessing.  But that's what it is and where we are at this point.

In case you are looking to buy me
something but didn't quite
know what to get.

For those of you who would think that I'm not doing this to have some of the the finer things in life... You would be WILDLY mistaken.  I would much rather get some sleep than to work extra hours to get the first flat-panel HDTV for the home.  We are really doing this so our family doesn't have to sacrifice one kids dreams for another.  We are doing this so that we don't ever have to rely on anyone (friends, family, govt) from now to well past old age (retirement and such).  We are doing this so that 5 years from now we aren't STILL telling our kids they can't go to the movies, to the store or even to a friends house because we can't afford it.  We are doing this so that emergencies don't cause us to have to decide whether to keep the house or the car.  We are doing this so that when my 3 girls get married off (in their 40s because they can't date until then) they will start life knowing how money works and knowing the best way to keep from having to work 2 jobs is to make sure you stay out of debt to begin with.  We are doing this to help break the "poor" cycle.  And, truly, we are doing this so that our finances start to have some resemblance of our character.  For me they haven't matched since college.  And it's LONG overdue.

Crime Doesn't Pay (But will occasionally leave the tip)

My two youngest daughters have decided to go into a life of crime.  They didn't consult with us (the loving-you-no-matter-what-you-do parents).  They just did it.  I'm sure they enjoyed it.  And I'm not sure, but I think they might do it again!

My wife had taken them to the store to do some lite grocery shopping.  She uses that cart with the car on the front.  I can't bring myself to use that thing yet.  I'm not sure why.  I think if I did, I would be too tempted to go running down the aisles as fast as I can making race car noises.  Then, if I ever pulled up next to someone else that was driving another "car" cart, I would get kicked out of the store because the Drag RACE would begin whether they wanted to race or not!  Just thinking about it right now makes me go swap some paint at the grocery store.  No kids... just me... the shopping cart.... and 1/4 mile stretch of unadulterated asphalt (or aisle 7 (whichever comes first)).  But anyway, this is not about me.

My wife finishes the shopping and gets out to the car with the groceries and the kids.  That's when she notices that the little angels decided to do a little shopping of their own.  And since NETHER of them have any money (that we know about) it was a shock to my wife.  I guess it would be considered a drive-by stealing because they were in that little car cart.  I was just envisioning them as Thelma and Louise. (Only without the sex... and the drinking... and the guns... and the suicide... and definitely NO Brad Pitt (sorry, honey)!  But other than that... Straight up Thelma and Louise!)

OK.  I know that stealing is bad.  It's still bad even when they use a not-so-bad-sounding term like shoplifting.  Shoplifting sounds more like seeing something in a store that you want so badly that it becomes a religious event. (Like, "I saw these shoes I just had to have.  It was a shoplifting experience! All of the cashiers rejoiced!")  Now, you can call me sad if you want but I was more upset with what they stole than the actual act of stealing.  They took Chicken Noodle Soup (OK), Pepperoni (Hmmm) and Kleenex (What the... Kleenex???).  Now, we need to talk.

I am completely at a crossroads with this issue.  I know they shouldn't steal (the 10 commandments, the law and all of that stuff).  But I've decided to wait a few weeks before I teach them that lesson.  My wife doesn't know this yet but I plan to take our lovely children shopping next week to Best Buy.  Father's Day is coming up soon and Daddy needs a new 52" Plasma TV.  Now, as a father I will not teach them that stealing is a good thing.  That would just make me a horrible father.  But if for some reason the 52" TV just happened to FALL off the shelf and into their pockets.... Hmmm....

If that happened, I would have no choice but to teach them the err of their ways when we got home and were mounting the TV on the wall.  And I think there are a few Blu-Ray movies that would do a better job than I ever could explaining the negative side of the path they have chosen.  I don't have a Blu-Ray player yet but I AM taking 2 kids to Best Buy.  And they BOTH need to learn a lesson.

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